Saturday, December 6, 2008

Pool Kreepy Krawlies are NEVER fun.

That fear that the majority of us had when we were kids, the ol' pool Kreepy Krawly.
Ah yes, that tubed monster that looks like some sort of weird underwater creature that would be found 10, 000 feet under the ocean waves.

That fear has stayed with some of us to our teenage years, for some even their adult years.

But the fear grows for these things when you are asked to ASSEMBLE and OPERATE one.

I woke up this morning at about 8:30, I didn't leave the comfort of my bed till 8:45. As I was walking down the stairs, I overhear my mother say something about how I was meant to assemble the Kreepy Krawly, I turn into the kitchen with my unwashed and unmoisturised face, drag the box over to the lounge, rip out the instructions and read.

Hmm, all seems pretty straight forward at this point in time.

I then proceed to drag the box outside to assemble it.

It is hot today, REAL HOT, and muggy, just the type of weather you want to have if you're going to be outside for the next three hours of your life.

2 hours later, after scratched legs from the "flapper" repeatedly colliding with my skin, blistered and swollen fingertips from the pipe connecting and a sore upper body from repeated pushing and pulling of certain parts. The sodding thing is assembled.

But the torture doesn't stop there, I then have to go and operate this.

I throw the Kreepy Krawly and the attached hose into the water, as I make my way over to the filter box to do some attachments and whatnot.

Hopefully, after 2 hours of assembling, it works.

Nothing, Zip, Nadda.

It doesn't move at all.
It doesn't suck anything up.

Even though every sodding thing is attached and placed correctly.

1 hour later after more struggling with trying to fix it, I deem it impossible.

It's not working, but I've managed to make it move .1 of a millimetre a second. YAY ME.

So now my pool has things growing in it, it remains green, it remains dirty and has little foreign bug things swimming in it.

I reckon if you fell in there, you'd die.

So now, I'm in pain trying type this with blistered fingers, and my back is starting to sting, the possibility of sunburn is high.

Approx. Time of my morning wasted: 3 hours.

How many days I'll have to wait till my father comes home to fix the pool: 5.

How many litres of sweat will drip out of my pores since I cannot cool myself off in the pool: Too many to count.

So remember kids, if you're parents ask you to EVER assemble a Kreepy Krawly you reply with a fast running movement and a plain ticket to the farthest corner of the globe.

Exact depiction of a what a Kreepy Krawly looks like.

No comments: