Tuesday, December 30, 2008

I lack an appropriate reason for a life.

This will be the second blog I've posted today, AND IT'S NEW YEARS EVE!

Shouldn't I be out doing something worthwhile other than sit at home all day?

Well, I WILL be doing something worthwhile in less than 4 hours. NEW YEARS EVE PAR-TAY!!!

Bekkah [sibling, idiosyncratic hoochie] is somewhat excited. AREN'T YOU BEKKAH? She also likes watching me type up my blogs. DON'T YOU BEKKAH?

So really, it's not some big climactic thing for her when she reads them.

ISN'T THAT RIGHT BEKKAH?

Getting back...
Tonight should be good. I don't hold out high hopes. I believe the lower your expectations are for something the better the outcome.

That's some rather dandy philosophy.

Bekkah will be eyeing off her little loverboy [who bares a familiar resemblance to John Mayer], while I'll have nothing to do other than sit the sod down and hopelessly entertain some little kids with terrible comedy, or singing or worse...no the singing will be the worst.

Or I could draw, BUT there are some issues with that.

Number One: I will, get asked by the little kids at this party to draw them. Mind you, there will be a plethora of kids. YAY. ME.
Number Two: I WILL GET INTERRUPTED. 'Nuff Said.
Number Three: I will get someone peering over my shoulder every 2 seconds saying, "MY WHAT A GREAT ARTIST!" Then I'll curl up into a ball that somehow resembles a beetroot and splutter a very awkward "t-t-thank you". OH YOU ARE JAM-PACKED WITH THE SOCIAL SKILLS AREN'T YOU, MONICA?!

So, not only am I a beetroot-resembling, bad-singing, terrible-comedian antisocial git, I'm also a terrible conversationalist.

YES. I'm terrible.
I can hold down a conversation quite well [here comes the bigotry], BUT, unless the person I am conversing with agrees on the topic I am conversing about [80% percent of the time, they don't agree] I cannot hold down the conversation, it will end up something like this..

Me: ..And don't get me started about that "Twilight" series. Worst story line ever.
Person: HOW COULD YOU SAY THAT! IT'S GREAT!
Me: Well, maybe I just appreciate good literature..
Person: TWILIGHT IS GOOD LITERATURE! EDWARD CULLEN IS HOT!!11!!one!1!!111

And stop right there.

I'm sorry the only example I have is with a Twilight fangirl. There's the justification that I just cannot talk to other human beings [excluding Twilight fangirls] well [Yes I am classifying Twilight fangirls as something other than 'human', and oh, how they wish the non-human thing I was classifying them as was a vampire Ha. Ha. Haaaaa.].

Well not really. I can converse with normal, average human beings. But then I will most obviously say something very stupid or very inappropriate.

Person: My what lovely hair you have!
Me: well, ugh, thanks. I l-like yours too?
Person: This ratty mop? HAHAHAHHAHA. Needs to be shaved off if you ask me. HAHAHA.
Me: He.He. Well, ugh, then you'd bare a striking resemblance to a cancer patient.

AND STOP RIGHT THERE!

Okay so yes, maybe I didn't have that EXACT conversation with someone, but the same sort of soul-crushing dialogue ensues.

It's a real worry.

And what does this have to do with the New Years Eve Party, well simple put. If someone tries to start a conversation with me, one of those two examples aforementioned will occur.

It's depressing, [DEPRESSING YAYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYY!!!!:D:D:D:D:D:D:D:D:DD:D:D:D:DDD:):):)!!!] because I think I have a somewhat intriguing personality [AND MODEST TOO MONICA!] and that cannot show in day-to-day exchanges of pleasantries, but anywayyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy, my true personality shows when I am with true friends. So all in all it's well good.

ANDDDDDDDDDDDDDD I find it amusing how I intended this blog to be a few paragraphs, and it has inclined to be well, pretty sodding long.

ANDDDDDDDDDDDDDDD, to just end this blog on a nice note, here's a picture of a blobfish.

2 comments:

pedro bokanofski said...

thnx....i liked reading this...can relate on a number of levels :)

traviss said...

that looks like one tasty blobfish. :3